Matchmaking or what?

 

In last part I talked about how culture of convenience has managed to engulf the marriage system. There is again this thing which has been in practice since ages called “bio-data” for marriage. So basically it’s like profile of individual who wants to venture into ‘marriage market’ to find ‘suitable match’ with of course ‘terms and conditions apply’. So just other day when I was having conversation with one of my friend who was not aware about existence of such thing known as bio data (I guess it is more famous here in Maharashtra) she was like what is it that you people do make a pamphlet of characteristics of person who wants to get married then what pass it on to all available and willing buyers who are constantly there keeping an open eye for some new entries into marriage market? Actually I didn’t correct her that no, passing on of this pamphlet is extremely limited and bounded by certain parameters which are highly normalised by our society to the extent that in expectations column you will see something like want someone who is ‘traditional’ but with ‘modern thinking’ and very few would raise an eyebrow on this and actually would contemplate is my daughter or son is modern enough to meet this oh so normal ‘expectation’. I mean it’ll be better to take ‘hands off” approach with this topic of how modernity of an individual gets decide.

Including name, education, date of birth and all personal details in this bio data thing can be considered as making some sense at least but what sense does it make for addition of status, property, color complexion, hobbies, and what not!  It really makes me wonder that like is it enough if you know that next individual likes reading and trekking because he/she has written these under hobbies section but what next? I mean certainly this can’t be the deciding factors when you have to choose your life partner! Inclusion of caste, sub caste, gotra into this thing makes sense as in, we are here talking about something that is so deeply embedded in mind of people living in this country that trying to reason with it would be waste of time but incorporation of colour complexion like what colour complexion has really to do with how two individuals gonna have that compatibility which is basic and foundation of every relation?

Again as there are many matrimonial sites now a day to help a person to get a good and perfect match what they have equivalent to this bio data thing is profile of a member but it generally not get questioned as it is there; on some standard platform where all ‘educated’ and ‘modern’ people have come together so it marks some kind of supremacy over those who are engaging in give and take of the bio data through social media or some other medium.

Giving and receiving some basic information prior taking any further decisions about marriage is valid as anything but including things which do not make even an ounce of a sense to be present in personal detail section suggests some changes that we need to make in ‘marriage market’ for it may exist longer as many of us still has to find our suitable match, right? ;)